Posts Tagged: wifey

Mellukah is almost upon us!

Posted by & filed under Friends, Family & Pets.

The annual festival of Mellukah (My wife’s birthday, to the layperson) is nearly here! I’ve been asking Melissa what she wants for her birthday. Her first answer, which is still what she includes with whatever else she’s thought of, is a “Zune” (Microsoft’s hacky version of Apple’s iPod). She only wants it out of spite… Read more »

Holiday Haiku

Posted by & filed under Personal.

When my wife and I were first dating, she told me that she was applying for a job in Kansas City, Missouri, to work for Hallmark, writing greeting cards. In a macho-macho-I-want-to-impress-you-so-you’ll-think-I’m-teh-hotnezz way, I wrote some Holiday Haiku. Here they are: You burnt the rib roast You slept with my brother twice Merry Christmas whore… Read more »

You should be envious of my homelife.

Posted by & filed under Friends, Family & Pets.

Last night, I was privy to my hot girlfriend (Melissa) and her best friend (Satya) wear pasties made out of copper. Satya had made them in her metalsmithing class earlier that day. Boy, were they glorious! Full areola coverage and then some, with faux-piercing and tassels to match! Pictured here is me wearing a slightly… Read more »